We all live in a wonderful logical world as I'm sure you will agree. Obviously, some of you will disagree, but you're the ones who have no idea where their towel is.
Did something occasion this outburst, you ask? Well, cast your mind back a few years (about 20 in fact). Remember when the Americans soft-landed a pair of probes on Mars? They were called 'Viking' I believe. Inescapable logic there for a start - the Vikings probably discovered America in the first place. the two probes carried no less than three separate experiments aimed at establishing whether there was life on the red planet. In the event, all three of them came up positive! The conclusion drawn from this was that they had made some kind of mistake and there was definitely no life there.
Now, a few years later, we aregreeted with the news that the discovery of something which looks like a fossil in a rock, that has been on earth for fifteen thousand years, proves that there is life on Mars. QED. I'd like to see them prove that it came from there anyway. Considering that it is supposed to have left there sixteen million years ago, what have they got to compare it with? I think we should be told.
In the UK there is a well-known TV authority on matters astronomical who used to state with great authority that there were no volcanoes on the moon. When they found one, he had always suspected as much. This same personality likes to tell us that our best telescopes can see x number of lightyears into space. This same x is the number of years since the big bang (allegedly), "So we can SEE the big bang!" Well son, whatever you can see, it must have travelled at the speed of light to get there and your mate Albert Einstein reckons that ain't possible. This is logic?
Have you ever watched the sea? No doubt you have and no doubt you have noticed foam on top of the waves. There must be some of you who have wondered where in the sea there is a motor with an out-of-balance fan or clutch to produce that effect. If you have ever seen an ultrasonic cleaner you just might have noted that you can fill it with a soapy solution and it still doesn't produce foam, even though it is being subjected to high frequency vibration. Nevertheless, we have experts who will swear that foaming fuel tanks are caused by out-of-balance fans or clutches - the same thing that cracks aluminium side frames. there must be someone out there who has seen fuel crack or aluminium foam. That IS logic.
There is a well-established writer about model helicopters who regularly tells us that the cure for a tailboom that shakes up and down is to fit a boom stay. What he doesn't tell us is just what he attaches the stay to in order to produce that effect. Photos would tend to indicate that he attaches the stay to the rear of the side frames or to the rear undercarriage strut. this would tend to indicate that it is only the boom itself that is wobbling up and down while the remainder of the machine is as steady as a rock. I wonder why HIS tanks ALWAYS foam. There must be a logical reason.
Some time ago there was a flourishing contest scene in the UK based on the FAI Helicopter class (F3C). Someone decided that a new set of manoeuvres was necessary and the event died overnight. Events to the old schedule continued for some time and attracted good entries. Nowadays, there is a 'Clubmans' event which is still based on that old schedule. Now, when a limited FAI scene has again begun to emerge, someone has again decided that a change is necessary. There used to be a 4 year rules 'freeze' on FAI events which ensured that no hasty changes were made. This time, things have happened so quickly that they are still arguing about it and making changes. Perhaps the motivator of this change could be persuaded to supply a video of himself flying the new manoeuvres as they are intended to be flown. This would help a lot as the published descriptions are almost useless. Let's hope his flying is better than his writing!
I note that our dear editor is thinking about changing the format of this magazine, and he keeps threatening to include video clips. As he already produces two magazines a month I can only conclude that he has to find some way to reduce his vast circulation (of the magazine, that is). Meanwhile, we all have to upgrade our graphics handling facilities so that we can read/play it. It's no coincidence that the links page now includes a software section. Remarks about logic seem inappropriate here.
Returning to where we started, it appears that it was NASA that decided that there was life on Mars. On November 7th they launched a new probe to the red planet and I hear that another is due to follow it in December. It must be pure coincidence that NASA keep telling us that they are short of funds.
Finally, I feel that I should apologise to our American readers for introducing irony into this column.